NZ MTC - "One Week Down - Two To Go!"

(Wednesday 25 January 2012)

As you may have figured out, my p day is Wednesday and most of that day is taken up by an early morning start then traveling to and from the temple and two temple sessions and lunch and the distribution centre then we arrive home.

Everyone fell asleep on the bus on the way home and only Elder Mohring and myself were awake. We took some HILARIOUS sleeping photos of elders. And I may have found a competitor in the sport of non-stop talking.

Dad says he made a blog about my adventures, just so you know I can't look at it. I can only email you on the computer

I got your package yesterday and I also got a letter from Kate.

On Saturday I had a hard day because I have found my problem with missionary work is that I am unable to feel the spirit. When I teach I mean. I was so down and upset on Saturday and my teacher showed me a clip from a talk by elder Bednar about "feeling the spirit" which helped.

Yesterday afternoon we had volunteer investigators from the public come to the mtc so we could teach them and Sister Kapalu and I had a good try at it. The last investigator was really talkative and I thought we did great, except I knew I was failing. If the spirit isn't there you can't teach. But, if you have the desire you are called to the work (D&C 4). I’m not lacking faith in God; I’m lacking faith in myself. I just couldn't comprehend why I wasn’t teaching with the spirit. And it's hard for me. Sister Kapalu is the quietest person I’ve ever met. I’ve figured that I need to learn to have silence and not to talk so much.

Yesterday I was feeling so bad because I didn't understand that heavenly father wanted me to serve but maybe I had done something to block the spirit. I’ve never prayed so much in a single day! But it's good. I love it here. I always get up on time; classes are great the missionaries are awesome. I pray every time for the spirit to be with me. Yesterday I was feeling so bad I was crying out of despair. I do my scripture study I learn in class but I was missing something.

I asked Elders Matautia, Whitehead and Macrae to give me a priesthood blessing and I felt a lot calmer after that. Then we had a lesson on stress management. MIGHT HAVE BEEN NICE TO KNOW BEFORE.

I’ve got 3 minutes left.

I sent India a letter, and Aliyah to our address because I don't know hers. Ask India to please find the Book of Mormon on my desk and give it to Aliyah with her letter and tell Aliyah it explains it in the letter.

I gave my winter jacket to my companion. She has so little. She is serving here in Auckland and was shivering and it wasn't that cold to me. Please don't buy me a new one; I’ll wait till Perth to see if i need one. And I don't care if you're mad, she needed it more than I did and you'll cool off in a year and a half ha-ha.

30 SECONDS!

I’ll tell you more about the missionaries here later!

Love Ash